Why is doing the right thing so difficult?
This month I was reflecting on behaviors and the challenges that managers regularly face. This is often multi layered and unsaid, in terms of what new managers will typically face when they take on leading a team.
I would be curious to hear your thoughts on this one!
Why is doing the right thing so difficult?
I was reflecting this week on a situation several years ago, where one of my team had come to me, upset, because they knew they had to have a difficult conversation with someone, and they were fearful of the outcome.
I listened as they outlined their concerns, frustrations and anxiety over the discussion that needed to happen. This was a continuation of previous ‘hard conversations,’ they had been undertaking.
But this time the question to me was different. It was along the lines of ‘Why should I bother? My peers are not tackling difficult conversations …I stand out as doing something different.’
This was more intriguing.
We discussed, at length, the purpose of the conversation that they were having and why it was important to team effectiveness and delivery. They understood that, but could see the ‘easy option’ that their peers had taken and so it was a little annoying to them, that their colleagues were not operating in the same way.
This got me thinking, how many missed opportunities are out there, for businesses to improve, because their management is not only unwilling to tackle to difficult conversations, but their leaders don’t want to stand out from their peers by doing the right thing.
This then highlights to me how courageous managers at times must be. They need to overcome the actual difficulty of the conversation or action but also the potential isolation from others who are unwilling to take the right (but more difficult) action. In a social sense it can take us way from the tribe..
And if we don’t want to stand out, or stretch ourselves, then mediocrity or poor performance is the only outcome that will prevail
Where does this leave us then?
As leaders, if we are noticing this difficulty across those we manage, there are several key areas to consider if we are serious about improving our team and the organization.
1. Am I demonstrating the behaviors and actions I want to see?
2. Am I creating the right culture that supports taking difficult action?
3. Am I ensuring to recruit managers with the right mindset and courage?
4. Am I challenging and training those who do not yet feel brave enough to lead difficult conversations?
Final Thoughts
At the end of the day, we want to be creating and maintaining an environment that celebrates and highlights those challenges (and difficulties) that help the team be better. If we are not willing to look at ourselves first to put in the extra effort that is required, then we should not be surprised when our managers choose to take the easy way out…allowing poor performance to prevail.